Props: Coat with football or wadded clothing under it for the Hunchback, hat or nightstick for Gendarme.
Announcer: The Hunchback of Notre Dame has decided to retire, and
has place an ad in the Paris Times for someone to come and learn
how to ring the bells.
Effects: (Knock, knock, knock)
Hunchback: (Gravely voice) Oh, somebody must be here about my
job. I'll go down and see. (Goes 'round and 'round
the campfire, as if going down the bell tower, bent
over due to hunch.)
Effects : (Knock, knock, knock)
Hunchback: (Angrily) I'm coming, I'm coming. There's a lot of
stairs here. (Arrives at and opens the door.)
Hunchback: Yeah ! What do you want ?
Applicant: I'm here about the bellringer's job.
Hunchback: All right ! Come on up and I'll see if you can do the
job. (Begins to go up (the other way around) followed
by the applicant.)
Applicant: Boy, the ceiling is not very high here, is it ?
Hunchback: Listen, you go up and down these stairs 20 times a day
for 45 years and you just learn to stay bent over.
Hey, did you close that door, didn't you ?
Applicant: I don't know. I don't remember.
Hunchback: Well, we gotta go down and keep it locked, can't run
up the church's fuel bill. (Both turn around and go
back.)
Hunchback: That's the first thing you gotta learn. Keep the door
closed. Up and down these stairs, that's the hard
part. (Arriving at door) O.K., so now you're here,
close the door.
Applicant: (Closes door) How are the benefits in this job ?
Hunchback: (Both going back up) Well, it has it's ups and downs.
The Church board will buy you ear plugs every six
months and a new bottle of bell polish once a year.
(Finally arriving at the bell) Alright, now you stand
over there, and I'll show you how it's done. First
you grab the bell here and push it out very hard
(steps back and follows path of bell out and back)
then the bell comes back on it's own. That's all
there is to it. Do you think you can do that ?
Applicant: Sure ! (does the action with the bell, but does not
step back, is hit by bell and falls back, to the
ground)
Hunchback: Oh my gosh ! He's fallen 15 stories to the sidewalk.
I'd better get down there. (Goes 'round and 'round
until he reaches the ground)
(Crowd enters mumbling, stops astonished at body)
Gendarme : (Entering, calls to Hunchback) Hey you ! Do you know
this guy ? (Rolls body over with foot)
Hunchback: No, but his face sure rings a bell !